WOMENS ENGLISH and translation:
or a guide to living with Jen:
Yes = No
No = Yes
Maybe = No
We need = I want
I'm sorry = You'll be sorry
We need to talk = I need to complain
Sure, go ahead = I don't want you to
Do what you want = You'll pay for this later
I'm not upset = Of course I'm upset, you moron
Are you listening to me??? = Too late, you're dead
You have to learn to communicate = Just agree with me
Be romantic, turn out the lights = I have flabby thighs
You're so manly = You need to shave and you sweat alot
Do you love me? = I'm going to ask for something expenxive
It's your decision = The correct decision should be obvious
by now You're certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever
think about? I'll be ready in a minute = Kick off your shoes and find a
good game on TV How much do you love me? = I did something today that
you're really not going to like
by now You're certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever
think about? I'll be ready in a minute = Kick off your shoes and find a
good game on TV How much do you love me? = I did something today that
you're really not going to like
Comments
DATE:
Or, a translation guide for women:
MEN'S ENGLISH:
I'm hungry = I'm hungry
I'm sleepy = I'm sleepy
I'm tired = I'm tired
Nice dress = Nice cleavage!
I love you = Let's have sex now
I'm bored = Do you want to have sex?
What's wrong = I guess sex is out of the question.
May I have this dance? = I'd like to have sex with you.
Can I call you sometime? = I'd like to have sex with you.
Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd like to have sex with you.
Will you marry me? = I want to have it illegal for you to have
sex with other guys.
You look tense, let me give you a massage = I want to have
sex with you, within the next ten minutes.
Let's talk = I am trying to impress you by showing that I am
a deep person, and then I'd like to have sex with you.
I don't think those shoes go with that outfit = I'm gay.
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Posted by: Jen | May 18, 2006 11:49 AM